today, i got frustrated bout 'her' meeting up with his cousins and taking pic with them.. seriously that time my mood just went bad for half of the day and feel bad cos he have to bear with my stupid freaking jealous attitude.. i kept on thinking why does 'she' have to come to kl to meet them up? im jealous cos 'she's' close to his cousins and im not. i kept thinking for the whole day bout why ppl dont like me.. the reasons i came up with is cos language barrier.. everyone knows i cant speak hokkien or cantonese. maybe because of that i have nothing to talk with his family. or his family cant communicate with me cos i cant speak cantonese. i was disappointed with myself.
i admit my jealousy level is freaking shit. i keep on tellin myself to forget bout the past and just live life as it goes.. but i kept on thinking bout his and 'her' past together. cos their relationship lasted for so long like 7 years. and i kept thinking there's so much memories between him and 'her'.
i gotta stop looking back to the past.. i MUST! because the most important thing is what is happening now and not the past. why do i even care bout what his family think bout me?? i just need to care what does God think bout me.. am i able to make God happy?? am i able to please Him with my life? I WANT TO WORSHIP YOU ALWAYS AND FOREVER!!
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